Happy?

Today a friend sent me a message and she wrote, at some point "please, be happy!". It had such a huge impact on me! Lately, when talking about myself, I'm saying that the only thing that I want is to be happy. And now somebody has to ask me to be happy?! How can I be asked to do what I want to do? What happened to me? Where and when did I lose myself? Something's wrong with me.

Today I stopped crying, I stopped being sad, I started resting at night, I smiled again. Because I have no idea what will happen in January. And why worry? There's no point in worrying now. For now, I just have to wait (I did it for 3 months, I can do it for 3 more weeks). And I will enjoy this time. Because I want to be happy.

Almost Christmas

It's almost Christmas. And I'm home. Finally home (not only phisically, but also mentally).

This year doesn't feel like Christmas. Or at least, not the Christmas mood that I see on TV. Neither the Christmas I remember as a kid. It's something different.

This year, Christmas feels like sleeping after crying for a long time. Being here, now, with my parents, talking to my mom about my problems, about her problems, about my future plans feels good. I don't think this Christmas is about Christmas. This year, I wasn't caught in the shopping fever, neither in the religious meaning of this day. So this year is just about being home.

Happy to be here and even happier for enjoying it :)

The end

Today is my last day here. This time tomorrow I will be in Riga, starting my Baltic trip.
Today it's snowing. And it's so damn beautiful! It simply makes me smile a lot.
Uff! My X is now over! I think teh best way to describe it would be "DON'T CRY BECAUSE IT CAME TO AN END! SMILE BECAUSE IT HAPPENED!". This is my feeling now. I am happy for all the chanegs in me, I am happy for the people I met, I am happy for my future plans.

I am really grateful I decided to take this internship. Now I am for sure a much more mature person. And I am in love with AIESEC again. Speaking of which, I decided to do a list with the things I discovered in AIESEC. I don't know if it's complete, but I will do my best to put down eveything:

• if you want to say something and make it clear to the others, use bullets :P
• planning tools
• conferences are amazing!!!! being OC or in the faci team is the best experience ever!!!!
• friends, best friends, the best friends
• positive thinking
• giving constructive feedback
• teamwork
• the power of believing in something
• passion can move mountains
• goal setting and goal achieving
• challenging processes and people
• people like happy people
• appreciation is the best thing to motivate the others
• my biggest fear is failing
• things happen for a reason
• actions have consequences (and I must accept this)
• I love Denmark, Hamburg and Buenos Aires
• the most important thing for me is to be happy with what I am doing and the people around me
• I CAN work with any type of person, but this doesn't mean I can be a friend of that person
• CSR
  
• training
• I can work with teenagers and they like me :)
• I believe that if between 2 persons is chemistry, then they will work together just fine:P
• I take responsibility for my actions
• I like being in charge of things
• I believe in qualitative experiences

I think I will leave this list open. Because my AIESEC career will not come to an end now :)

Recovery

Finally!!!!

I am enjoying my second week in recovery stage. It feels so nice to talk about cultural shock and being able to say to my kids that I am now in recovery stage.

Everything is so nice. I just had an amazing weekend in Kaunas, my kids last week gave me the best present in the world that I will take with me wherever I'll live, I am trying to learn Lithuanian, I am doing sport 1 hour a day (everyday), I like my life.

I'm happy here. I still miss home, I still miss us, but this is not stopping me from enjoying what I have here and now.

The challenge

Adisor (my beloved laptop) is about to die. In less than 15 minutes, I will run out of battery and I will not be able to charge it again. It's the second time it's happening sine I came to Lithuania. It sucks! So for the next 20 days (until I will get home) I will no longer have my movies, my pictures, my music, my internet whenever I feel like. Luckily, I saw all the episodes from Grey's Anatomy (the ones that were released so far), so the pain won't be excruciating :P

The good thing is that this morning, when I saw that it stopped charging, I was pretty calm. I mean, I did call mami to let her know about the lack of internet access during the weekend, I cried for 10 minutes, but then I did some plans on how to spend my time from now on. And I think I was pretty good in this. Let's see what will happen...

Good bye, Adisor!

My X

My X, so far... The best way to describe it is in bullets:

• I think the most important lesson I learned is that I am the only one responsible for my experience. My friends kept telling me this over and over again, but it was only 3 days ago I actually realized it. I really hope I will remember this lesson for the rest of my life (if I will forget it, I will come back to this blog and try to remember it).
• I like what I am doing. Training is amazing. I think I'm getting better and better. I think I start having my own training style. It's harder and harder to compromise and work with Jesse. We have totally different and opposite opinions about education and I think we stopped working as a team. We are 2 individuals that share the same time, space and people. But I'd rather be happy with myself than compromising about something I deeply care about.
• Sometimes, when you want something from someone, the easiest way to get it is asking for it. I was surprised by the results of this
• Is lovely to have a roommate with whom you get along 
• This is not what I expected in terms of people. But the few special persons I met totally worth this experience.
• I visited my best friend. Amazing weekend! And I started drinking capuccino afterwards (Roxi, I hope we'll meet again for a capuccino in Deli de Luca)
• I'm surrounded by good music every day :)
• to be continued...

So what?

So what if I have no idea what I want to do with my life?

Even if what I'm trying right now won't last forever, at 24-25 I will still be young. Even 2,3,4 years from now I will still have the chance to travel and figure out how the world looks like. 

So for now I will just enjoy and experience what I have. I wanted it for so long...

Simply great!

Tonight we were invited to a traditional music and dances show. And since one of the dancers is a friend of ours, we went. It was really, really nice. Lithuanian dances are very energetic and a bit funny. I was really, really amazed to see the old men dancing (they were around 70-80). 

But the really cool part started only after that. We went to a party where everyone was dancing traditional Lithuanian dances. That felt really good! A lot of running, jumping, turning around...

Happy me!

Woow!

I think I'm lucky. I work with a passionate person. I just had a very interesting conversation with Jesse and I could see how passionate he is about Nigeria, about making a difference, about changing things. I really admire him.

And I also had an AHA moment about myself: "I was educated not to care about Africa". I really, really feel that my worldview is extremly narrow. I should definitely do some more research in this field. And not only this. 

Wish me good luck in trying to open my eyes!

It's the small things that matter

It's been a long time since I wanted to write on my blog, but I didn't know exactly what to write. There's not much going on... It's just me, living a simple life. It's all about me appreciating small things. I think this is the most important thing I've learnt here... 

So, this is what makes me happy now:

The train ride. The snow. Chairing next LCM. The breakfast with Sigita, Monika and Brandy. Talking every night with Laura. Having internet. The chocolate cheese bars. The home baked cookies in the school. The bus on the way back to Siauliai. The book I share with Laura. The plum jam. Corn flakes. Ally McBeal. 3% fat yogurt. Golden boy. The house in the middle of the woods. The lake. The top of the cathedral. Tea in office. Tea everywhere. Hot chocolate. Mushroom biscuits. Sunny boy. NatCo. Staying in Vilnius. MC0910 in Latvia. Jesse challenging me every day.

I'm happy I am grateful for what I have. I'm slowly, but surely growing up :)

22 noiembrie

Pe 22 noiembrie sunt alegeri prezidentiale. Urmarind statisticile alegerilor de dupa 90, prezenta la vot a scazut cu aproximativ 20% (de la 73,23% la 55,20%). Cei mai multi nu mai au incredere in politicieni si cred ca nu pot sa schimbe nimic prin prezenta la vot. Daca toti oamenii ar gandi la fel, oare ce s-ar intampla? 

Eu merg sa votez.  Eu cred ca trebuie sa ma fac auzita. Eu cred ca parerea mea conteaza pentru Romania.

X

I was thinking a lot about X these days. And about AIESEC.

My conclusion is very simple... in AIESEC you do some things really, really well, but when it comes to the core product of the organization - AIESEC XP - things are really screwed up. Thinking about the people I met in AIESEC, I would say that only 20% of them actually had a qualitative complete AIESEC experience.

How come? Why? Why does this organization focuses so much on numbers and quality is so left behind? Why do you find internships where you should be a receptionist or a travel guide when you are promissed professional and personal development? Why do you have internships where you go to work and you have nothing to do all day long or when your JD is so different from what you are promissed? Why do you promote X as being the coolest experience ever and more than half of the EPs I know were dissatisfied with what they got? True, in such circumstances, you get to be much more tolerant and positive and you gain a lot personally... but why noone tells you the truth about what will happen to you? Oh.. and why people that are in EBs/MCs and think the same way don't just do something to change it?

I'm looking for an answer to these questions...

Amazing weekend

Vilnius is great!

I am simply in love with the city... The people, the parks (or the forrests), the atmosphere, the amber... Simply in love!

There were only 2 things missing... the ability to capture the beauty of the moment and him, to hold my hand while walking along the river...

Winter time already?!

2 days ago it was snowing. The temperature is maximum 3-5 degrees. At 7 is already dark. In the room is so cold that I can barely stay here for more than 1 hour.
I wasn´t prepared for this. So of course my first reaction was to complain, to be bitchy and pissed off. But I think things will get better. Or at least I hope they will.

This is how it all begins

According to myaiesec.net, I am officially an intern in Siauliai, Lithuania.

I started my experience yesterday, on a pretty cold October Tuesday. After a long flight (actually, waiting 4 hours in Prague was the boring part, but luckily I had Ally McBeal with me) I arrived in Riga. The girls were waiting for me in the airport with a really, really nice poster and an AIESEC banner. We drove to Siauliai and the moment we entered Lithuania we stopped for the traditional Lithuanian welcome: a shot of vodka (not as bad as our palinca) and bread (really good, black with seeds, home baked by a member's mom) with salt.

The beginning seemed promising. But when I got "home", things changed a bit. I live in a semi communist dorm where everything is white and cold. The only cool thing about the room was the message from my roommate. After I managed to unpack some of my stuff, we went out for a tea and then back to the dorm to chill. The people are really nice,but they are not used with internationals around them, so they speak in Lithuanian most of the time. At some point I couldn't take it and I "kindly" asked them to speak in English and things improved.

Last night was interesting, because we had an electricity blackout so it wasn't only unbelievably cold, but it was also dark. Luckily, my roommate, Laura, warned me that I should put on a lot of clothes before going to sleep and so I did. About my roommate... Her name is Laura, she's 23 and she's from Denmark. Her English is really, really good (unlike that of most of the people here) with an Aussie accent. She looks a lot like Ruth, my CCP from Brazil. She's a really nice person, very new to AIESEC. I think we will get along very well. 

Today I woke up feeling much better. I remembered one of my laws: "the moment you stop comparing is the moment you start being happy". I think that it also helped the really, really hot shower I took. Then Vika (VP X) came and brought us to the office (us means me and Sadrik - the other intern from Uzbekistan). We had a short meeting about the project and I had time to talk to Andrei and Roxi and get some work done.

So, first impressions on Siauliai:

• it's so damn cooold
• people are very nice and helpful
• AIESEC office is a really nice place and you can have tea here (this makes me happy and keeps the cold away)

I think I will take Roxi's advice and I will fall in love with my X experience...

Impossible is nothing?

I was thinking tonight about AIESEC. Actually about performance in AIESEC. About how things are done. About what AIESEC wants to achieve as organization. About growth. About term 0809 in AIESEC Cluj, so about "impossible is nothing".

Is this true? Is is true that impossible is nothing? That you can achieve everything and that you can break any limit? I really think that as individual you can do it. Look at all the runners, the gymnasts, the athlets. All it takes is a stong will and a lot of hard work. It's not easy, but it's achievable.

But what about teams? Can a team prove that impossible is nothing? I've never seen one that did it so far. I believe that is you want to actually succeed in doing this as a team, all your team members have to have constantly the vibe of "impossible is nothing". But is this enough? Don't think so. They also need a clear direction and experience to fail, suceed and discover their own key of succes... And something else... the team vibe. The feeling that they are working for a common objective, that they have a vision and of course they see their benefits in being there.

But what do you do when your team is unbelievably diverse and driven by so many reasons? Can you inspire the feeling of "impossible is nothing"? Can you make them achieve impossible? Still looking for an answer....

right now

Right now, I'm in my room in Cluj.
Right now, I feel like a stranger here.
Right now, I can smell the chocolate cake I baked.
Right now, I feel happy.
Right now, I'm thinking about him.
Right now, I'm listening to an amazing singer (Emm Gryner).
Right now, I wish I had my friends near me.
Right now, I would tell her how sorry I am for all the stupid and childish things I did.
Right now, I wish I had a team like their's.
Right now,I'm thinking about my future.
Right now, it's just me...

Enthusiasm

A month ago I was convinced I lost my enthusiasm. I had no idea that all I had to do was to look a little bit outside the box I was living in and talk more to other persons than the ones I worked with. But now it's back. Briefly, my enthusiasm was brought back by the people I met lately (the ones that dream big) and the diversity around me. And I'm gonna keep my enthusiasm. Because now I know that sheer beauty that surprises me every moment is just around the corner.

Being enthusiastic about what I am doing or about the people I work with is something that defines me. And I want to remember this for the rest of my life. And I will take this into account whenever I have to make a decision about my future, especially about my professional future.

Just to make sure that I will have forever this enthusiasm with me, I will always surround myself by 2 basic things: people that dream big and diversity.

People with beautiful, big dreams are like matches for me. I think that all the energy and good humour I have is like gasoline stored in several recepients. Each recepient needs something to be set on fire. And I don't always have the matches with me. So this is why I need those fabolous people around me. Finally, I do believe what a wise friend of mine told me repeatedly more than a year ago: "people like happy people" :)

Diversity is the second type of matches. It's mainly about diversity in mentalities and behavious, but also diversity in landscape and people I hang out with. I am simoultaneously fascinated and challenged by diversity. Sometimes it takes me long to understand and accept it, but I am always involved with all my being in this. Diversity challenges me and all the time when I meet something new, I end up knowing even more about myself. I end up being more aware of what is outside my universe, but also I get to see a glimpse of the boundaries of this universe.

And I'm really happy I found these 2 sources of enthusiasm in AIESEC, which can only make me want to continue being a member of this organization and actually bringing the added value that I can bring. The future seems pink and shiny for me :)

Friendship

I think that only now I realised that Roxi is one of the persons I took for granted. And I miss her and our endless conversations.

Soricel.

Goal setting

How do you set goals? This is something that I've been thinking about for a couple of years and I still didn't figure out what's the best way to do things.
We all set goals. For our personal life, for our professional path, when it comes to sports or competitions we enter. But my questions is about how high should be this goal? Should we believe that impossible is nothing? How far should we go with our optimism?
Personally, I don't believe in "Aim for the moon. Even if you don't reach it, you'll land among the stars". I think that we should set goals according to our internal resources: our commitment, our ambition, our willingness to sacrifice things for what we want.

It took me a while to admit that this is what I believe in. And I think setting goals you can reach builds self confidence and it leads to growth step by step. And I am convinced that by having more self confidence, any person will challenge himself/herself even more and more and in the end have really high standards.

Back here

It's been a while since my last post (many reasons, but mainly procrastination).
A small update of my life lately: I graduated, no more AIESEC Cluj, a small trip to visit Lore and then Paris, 1 week at home and now back to Cluj for an unknown period of time.
And most of all, many new thoughts running through my head. Many things I want to start, some of which I started already, some that are on hold.
But I think that the most important thing is that during this trip I discovered myself and I started being happy again. I actually forgot how it feels to be happy, to enjoy what is happening to you, to take chances, to smile and see the beauty of all the things around you.
I like my life again. It's full of color and surprises :)

In love

Hamburg
rain. the bike. the wheel. the statue. the church. Alster. American Embassy. jogging. dennis' place. the class. the library. a house. the conversation. coldplay. the highway. the train. harbour. Elbe. life. the feelings. the youth. the spirit.

Buenos Aires
tortoni. the theathre. lemon cake. japanese garden. evita. the hostel. the unusal. the coincidence. the tulip. the colours. museum. rain. the harbour. smiles. mate. steak. tango. passion. the coffee place. boots. law school. the view. the peace. poverty. Dacia. the rose garden. the congress. the kiss. wine. the dinner. getting lost. shopping. blue sky. funny clouds.

I'm simply in love with these two cities. They represent the only two places where I felt home, where I felt myself, where I was completely FREE! I'm coming soon... wait for me!

D'ale vietii valuri

Mi-e dor de cartea lui Musatescu. In anul I o aveam pe raft si o rasfoiam de cate ori simteam nevoia sa ma conectez la ceva familiar din trecut. Acum nu mai e pe raft. Si nici dorinta de a ma conecta cu trecutul nu mai e chiar atat de puternica. Incep sa invat sa traiesc in prezent, which is cool.

S-au intamplat multe in ultima vreme. De cele mai multe ori lucruri stupide pe care nu credeai ca o sa le mai traiesti la 21 de ani si care au niste consecinte care imi mananca timpul, energia si cupoanele de tren. S-au intamplat si lucruri frumoase, si lucruri impulsive si multe ganduri.

Dar cred ca cel mai dragut dintre toate a fost perioada festivitatilor. Am asistat la mai multe decat mi-as fi imaginat. Chiar daca nu il consider adevaratul moment al terminarii facultatii, e un prilej fain sa fii alaturi de cei dragi si sa sarbatoresti un pic in familie. Mi-am dat seama ca desi am tratat cu oarecare scepticism momentul, am fost imens de fericita cand i-am vazut pe prietenii mei cei mai buni si pe bingbangeri acolo.

S-au mai intamplat si alte lucruri frumoase... am fost acasa (ca urmare a unei impulsivitati poate greu de inteles). Pentru numai 10 ore, e drept, insa le-am apreciat enorm de mult pentru ca aveam atat de multa nevoie sa fiu acasa. Si am avut si un AHA moment: mi-am dat seama ca pentru a avea "acasa" nu e suficient sa ai numai un job fain, prieteni cu care sa te simti bine sau familia langa tine. Pentru mine "acasa" inseamna sa ma simt bine si in locul in care ma intorc in fiecare seara. Si de la acest AHA moment a pornit si un obiectiv pentru octombrie (desi nu m-as supara daca ar deveni realitate mai devreme): o camera doar a mea, cu oglinda mare, muuuuuuuuulte jucarii de plus, un birou, begonii si azalee, intr-un apartament micut si cochet pe care sa il impart cu oameni pe care ii plac.

M-am intalnit cu Umbreluta mea si am stat la povesti interminabile pe o banca in spatele MC Officeului. Si am fost in MC Office!!!!!!! De cand eram newie mi-am dorit sa ajung acolo. Pe-atunci vedeam MC-ul ca fiind cei mai tari oameni din AIESEC Romania, care muncesc in cel mai fain, funny-organizat mod cu putinta. Perceptia s-a mai schimbat intre timp ca doar am mai crescut si s-aumai schimbat MC-urile, dar fascinatia pentru sediu a ramas :P

Si evident au fost tot felul de lucruri marunte si faine care s-au mai intamplat: o discutie cu JuanPa sau Saman, cateva fragmente dintr-o carte pe fotoliile exagerat de comode de la Diverta, miros de petunii in drum spre casa, o vointa care se intareste pe zi ce trece, peretele meu personalizat (plicul de sugarcubes de la IPM, posterul cu funky EB, 2 citate de la Alba, o diploma de la IPM, o vedere cu Malaezia).

Si tot din categoria lucruri faine, s-a intamplat TRIX. Momentele de remarcat: take over, un sugar cube din categoria "wallet sugar cubes", roll call-ul EB-ului meu pe o melodie braziliana :), sunt veteran, cateva plimbari prin natura si discutii simple, pe teme absolut banale, dar care au contat asa de mult...

Traiesc vremuri bune :) Diseara ies cu bingbangerii!

Ce simplu ar fi

Ce simplu ar fi daca:

• procesul de invatare si dezvoltare ar fi precum mersul la cumparaturi: iti alegi produsul, il pui in cos, platesti si il duci acasa
• as fi fericita cu viata pe care o am acum
• as sti sa apreciez tot ce am frumos langa mine
• as avea curaj sa accept si sa lupt pentru ceea ce vreau
• dimineata m-as trezi fara sa sune ceasul
• soarele ar ajunge la mine zambind din spatele unei draperii portocalii
• as avea un "acasa"
• m-ar astepta un ceai cald acasa
• m-as intalni mai des cu oamenii la care tin
• nu as mai fi egoista
• as putea sa uit ceea ce inca imi mai amintesc si inca mai doare
• m-as retrage macar pentru o ora intr-o livada de ciresi infloriti
• as accepta...

Dar prea complicata viata nu ma lasa.

This is me :)

This is what made my day lately:

• I'm going to Barcelona with Ana and Luigi (maybe Luna and Joao will join us):)
• I met with the girls last night and we enjoyed narghilea with watermelon (delicious)
• Next weeek is Vama concert and the entrance is only 10 RON :)
• Talking to Saman and Oana
• My decision to invest in having a lifestyle that I like
• Dreaming about Malaysia and Singapore
• Realising that there are people that travelled all over the world
• My class of "Minorities in Europe"
• Snow
• Realising what motivates me (too bad that most of th sources are external and therefore hard to have them around all the time I need them)
• Roxi is MCVPX X in Norway (I'm sooooooooooo happy for her)
• My black glasses & my earings with masks
• Being aware how lucky I am that my parents support me in all my decisions
• Talking to Anusca last night and having a lovely brunch with her today (she moved in Hasdeu, me soo happy)

THE experience

I think now it's over. At least, this is what my body is telling me.
Even if the conference ended a couple of days ago, seeing delegates all over the place and having fun with them in Rome made the end smoother.

I loved IPM. By far, it was the best experience of my life. The responsibilities, the team, the storming, the delegates, the hotel, the parties, the things I discovered about people, the dreams that were born, the friendships that I made... for all these, I loved the conference. I know for sure that it was the best choice that I could have made in order to start an amazing year. No matter what the future holds in store for me (if it's gonna be Malaysia or the eurotrip I dreamt about for the past 6 years), it's gonna be amazing.

If I am to look back at the conference, I would say that I grew. I found a lot of things about myself, I improved some, I started to work on others. Overall, I am a bit different and one step closer to the person that I want to become. I owe this to the team with which I worked for the past month, to living in Rome, to some delegates and some friends that really let me down.

Yesterday was the last amazing day of Roming... waking up late, talking to Roxanel, visiting Coloseum with Dimitris, having DS feedback, going out again on Campo de Fiori and seeing my favourite delegates... Today is sad and rainy and without energy. It's closing and it's almost time to go back home...

:)

I took the 43 Things Personality Quiz and found out I'm a

Self-Knowing Self-Improving Tree Hugger

Some thoughts

It's been 2 weeks since I arrived here. One word to describe the experience so far: REAL. I think it's for the first time when I feel that AIESEC is not just a dream world, but something really connected to the rest of the universe.

I have a new routine that involves waking up at 7 or 8 (hate it, but I have to live with it), working in the office, eating daily apples, sandwiches and pasta, going out more than I did it in the last 3 months, waiting in Piazza Venezia for the night bus, passing near the flower/drugs shop at 3 a.m. It's nice to have an apartment, especially after 2 years and a half in a dorm. I can't wait for the moment when I will have my own apartment (and hopefully my own Smart). You know, Rome is the city where they sale the most Smarts. That's amazing! You can see them everywhere, in the smallest parking places or in between normal cars that seem giants. And they are not that expensive either (around 10000 euros).

So many things have crossed my mind in the last weeks. Again, I discovered so many things about myself (no strenghts though, only things to be improved). I am trying to ge out of my confort zone every day. On a professional level, by working with my TL (why the storming part with my leaders always takes such a long time??), by trying to write something for my thesis (and again it's not going that well)... on a personal level, I realised I made friends faster and easier than in Brazil and I challenged a lot my perspective on relationships.

I like being here. Maybe because of the challenges, maybe because of the city, maybe because of the people, maybe because I'm running away from something really scary that awaits me at home, maybe because of the awasome discussions I had with my team mates.

Back to work now....

Silvia in Italy

There are so many things to say, so many things to do, so many feelings, so many things I left at home, so many new experiences that await me, so many interesting conversation. So far it was awesome! The people are so nice, so commited, Rome is amazing even though is winter (today we had a really long lunch in the sun eating lasagna), the apartment where I live is amazing (can't wait to have one)!

HAAAAAAAAAAAAPPY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

On the Angels' Bridge

Me & my apartment mates

Preparing for a session

With Luigi and Sara at Fontana di Trevi

A new source of motivation

Yesterday I had a pretty awesome day(of course I didn't study as much as I should have). It started with checking my email and seeing that Tyna was accepted as CC for MENAXLD (I'm sooooooooooooooooooooooo proud of her and extremly happy for what she chose to do next in AIESEC).

And speaking of Tyna, I realised last night, after talking to her about 6-7 hours (mainly about AIESEC) that she gave me a huge boost of motivation and love for the organization. It's amazing to see how a person that hasn't always received all she wanted in AIESEC is still here and getting involved in the organization without grudge.

Thanks Tyna for motivating me and may you have the most memorable experience of your life in Egypt!

Change agents

I am a member of an organization which is suppossed to create change agents. Still, from the very first day I understood that, I kept asking myself what is a true change agent (of course, the easiest answer is "it depends")? After many conversations about the topic, many thoughts, some movies and feeling extremly frustrated about the topic, I finally figured out how do I think a change agent looks like/acts. So, in bullets:

• he/she has an active involvement in the positive development of the people around him/her
• he/she is a leader (at least informal leader, it's not necessary to have a formal leadership position)
• he/she has an active and constant contribution to solve important, urgent and real problems of the society where he/she lives/travels
• he/she has a set of values and principles and lives his/her life according to them
• he/she is a double bagger
• he/she is considered a role model
• he/she has a clear understanding of politics, economics and history
• he/she is aware of cultural differences and manages to use them in his/her advantage
• he/she is a responsible, humble and brave person
• he/she is a person that is passionate about what he/she is doing
• he/she is a person that loves a significant other or friends or family or random people or cats or dogs or etc.

So this is how a change agent should look like in my opinion. It may not be complete nor fair, but it's my opinion and this is what I am striving for. I was so sick of thinking that a change agent is some sort of hero, something pretty much unattainable by most mortals. So yes, now I have established what I am going to. All I have to do is continue walking on the path I have started because I am on the right way.

A bunch of small and yet smiley things

Today... a cool day!
To make a wrap up: it was snowing when I woke up, a phone call from mami early in the morning (it's so nice when the first thing you hear when you wake up is the voice of someone you love and not your own haunting thoughts), an exam that was interesting, shopping, a taxi ride with one of the most interesting drivers so far (he told me a lot about the old Cluj, about the buildings, about Marasti and other stuff like that) a meeting where I felt useful and I felt that I can actually have an impact if I behave in a certain way, another meeting (business stuff) and a very enjoyable ride to Polus talking about life and kids with the lady that will organize the graduation ceremony, again shopping, then back to the dorm and now listening to some music and talking to someone I kind of miss.
So, it's about the small things. The sum of every action that I take, every person I talk to is what makes me feel happy and makes me feel alive. I believe in the beauty of the small things. I feel like now I am painting a huge paint and every moment I just add more stain of colour, some of them that fit together, some of them that don't fit, but they are waiting for that magic touch that will give sense to the painting.
So... did I mention that all the small things lately made me feel happy?
I am living the best year of my life! And I am sure that the best is yet to come... so while enjoying my present, I'm waiting to see what the future holds in store for me :)

Simply happy

I am happy. I had the best New Year's Eve ever. I was lucky enough to be with my dearest friends from Brazil. I am still thinking that I am the luckiest person in the world for the friends I have, for the amazing opportunity of being CC in Brazil, for the team I was part of. I am soo happy. It's been a while since I felt my heart so easy, so full of positive energy, so home. This short CC reunion worth every single thing I sacrificied for it.

Going to the bus station

Waiting for the best spinach pizza

Preparing decorations for NYE

Freezing in Losanky around midnight

Me & Uros

Us, the CC:)

I was planning to write more, but I don't know exactly what to write. Because everything we did was so normal, so natural, that it reinforced the act that happiness comes from simple things done with the ones you love. We were again the crazy family from CC pre-stay. Amazing!

I had no idea a couple of years ago that it is written for me to be so happy and have true friends all over the world!